Being Crazy

I am cranky and crazy in every sense

That I have immense faith in this state of craziness.

I want to devour as much experience of being crazy

And brandish to the world, my form!

Not an arm they shall then raise against my state of being,

For I am crazy in every sense.

The Goal Post

Incarcerated with multitudes of emotions

All rolled up into one big ball of imbroglio.

The ball rolls further and picks up grime,

And comes underneath my foot to be kicked!

I kick it with a thud

And it straight reaches the goal post of emotions again!

The ball loses its geometric design

And blends into a colourful cocktail of thoughts and emotions...

Last few weeks of 20's

Almost a year-long struggle of uncertainty. Veering me towards an eclectic range of networking with people. Here's the thing-  it is like a storm that hit me so hard that it blew me to a different land altogether. And then what happens? Bloody, a sea of changes, which in fact has even got me writing this very piece and maintaining this very blog of mine which had hitherto remained dormant. To stay connected, just a ping away, yet not readily accessible is quite an 'oxymoronic'  state of mind. A pleasurable experience, all in the name of a 'job search!" The whole saga got me evolving as a personality just before I creep into my 30's. Hanging right there I am, in the last few weeks of my 20's, although with a slight despair that I can no longer continue saying "hey am 29!"The 9 seems to be giving way to 10 in just a couple of weeks from now.
Anyway, I am super thrilled and joyous about the fact that I could network with like-minded (this is of supreme importance) just before I turn 30. Who knows what's going to happen next, I know that's quite a

clichéd statement, but I will still use it. Age is just a number and all that paraphernalia is something that I'd still strongly believe in- albeit this number 30 seems to be quite like an edifying experience. I will revel in it, this very moment, for it is this moment that feels super refreshing, a hands-down SERENDIPITY!

Nothing special, just 30!

Pottering along the last of 20’s,

An entry I make into a new unit of 10

30’s are this, and 30’s are that-

The world comes behind you

With a host of instruction-laden speeches!

Budge, I don’t want to,

For I have my own evolving vision.

A set of qualities that I’d like to nurse till the end

A set that I’d like to be synonymous with:

Banal and ostensible they may sound

Yet they’d be my own proud possessions:

Reticence- Oh how much one needs this;

Helps wield a good command of undeterred respect

Patience- The ‘bestest’ is yet to come;

Patience teaches me just that!

Unflinching confidence in self- Self Explanatory!

Fitness- A fit body to house the above.

Manicure

"Please come madam, sit here," she coyly led me to a comfortably ostensible sofa. I had just entered one of the city's popular chain of spa and salon. I thanked her and settled down for a session of manicure. I could figure out that she wasn't a Tamil speaking lass. She began with her work on me- stretching my hand out to reach for my nails so she could get them filed. I was supposed to be relaxing there as it was my weekend get away. However I couldn't but help engage in a conversation with her. I need to be resting the blame on my inquisitiveness I say. I kept gazing at her- she was all but a tiny frame trying to earn a living by serving the salon's customers who want to plough into some opulence.

She caught me gazing and I quickly returned a smile. She fields my gaze at her with a question- "Aap ka shaadi hogya?" (Are you married)? That question got us talking. She hails from Jalpaigudi, West Bengal, India. The moment I showed signs of my geographical awareness, she seemed to be thrilled- She quickly acknowledged that with a question- "Aap Jalpaigudi jaante ho?" (Are you familiar with the place)? There have been multiple such people whom I have met- I have always been curious to know more about them. What made her different- and make me want to write about her-I really don't have a direct answer. Nonetheless, I carry on with my newfound acquaintance. I was bowled over with the rest of the conversation that ensued. This puny thing was married!! She was all but 21 and had come down all the way from Jalpaigudi for the sake of love- I had asked her what she was doing here in Chennai, where she has no linguistic or cultural familiarity! She gingerly replied- "Woh yahan kaam karthen hain na, uskeliye!" (He works here, and thus am here)! Hamare bhaai ka dost hain woh-(he's my brother's friend)-was the answer to the connection that I was trying to establish, for I still couldn't place her here in Chennai, of all the places- not that Chennai is bad or anything- All I thought was, she could have been closer to her home. Her work seemed rather lighter and non-monotoned- for she was discussing her life with me. Perhaps not many would have had the slightest botheration. After all the hassle of having been able to relocate to Chennai and run a home, she says that she hardly gets to meet him now- their schedules were different- including their day-offs. Amidst the story, she deftly manages to brush my arms and have them massaged- Pressure ok hain na, she's quick to check with me. (is the pressure for the massage ok)? Now I was more interested in getting to know this little woman, so everything seemed just perfect. Oh no, I am not going to be talking about her entire life thus far here. This is just an introspection, over the lovely lives we get to lead whilst there are some others out there doing I wouldn't say menial jobs, yet struggle to get ends meet. While she's almost done with her work on me, her colleague checks the clock and hints at her saying- "hey your shift is about to end." As she was wrapping up for the day, I pottered around there and came to know that these girls employed there are timed for the work they do. Thinking aloud with me she says, "how could I possibly get a manicure or any other service done in just 30 mins?" It is not plausible- the customer would raise their voice stating that the service isn't gratifying. It's a constant battle, she says, between keeping up time and managing the tantrums of her bosses on the floor. I thanked her with glee, inquiring her name- she sheepishly replied- Geetha, aur aapka (and yours)?

Mirage

So near yet so damn far
Chances are but an illusory affair
A sea of availability around
Choose they do to hit the shore; wave-like
Lasting barely for a few seconds,
They revert to the sea
And stay in tact, yet afloat the sea's surface.

Pools of water lie before
Chances are bequeathed like an oasis
Yet they vanish;
Leaving the mind with a mirage!

The world seems on one's palm top,
Readily present-
Just a touch away,
Yet veiled by the virtual wall.

All is but a hallucination
Where mortals just ride on
Sometimes, pause to ponder,
And assume preposterously
That this is life!

Rocking on - on a hammock

A releasing platform it was-the hammock. Tied to a lush coconut tree with the surroundings swathed by long blades of grass and a relieving breeze. An outing of sorts. To feel each other when they wanted to sense what it is like, to be up close at a huggable distance, and yet not hug. Just gazing at each other, with heightened adoration. The two were vacationing- you could term it as their weekend hangout spot. Discussing sweet nothings with their legs, entwined. Hitting each other with their toes and teasing for the heck of it. They would rest all afternoon until it was dusk- and then they lazily strut around to watch the evening sky- sunk in a pinkish gauze of the retiring Sun. They write on each others' backs and guess the words they wrote. Little pranks they played and bade goodbye to their day-out. A cameo indulgence they dived into- rocking on, on a hammock...

Chambers for rent

Oh but hitherto unexplored chambers they were,

Entwined with nerves- thinking tendons

With life brimming:

A lion’s share seized by an owner-in-semblance.

The owner wasn’t all

Hauled by many a seeker,

Who yearned to test waters...

Not all seekers could be let in

Not even for an inspection

For they were just curious and not concerned!

Yet the chambers longed for a peek

Not seeking long-term tenancy,

Yet partaking in some space-sharing

One at a time, with its owner intact!